Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
