you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize
