You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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