Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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