Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Randomize
