The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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