i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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