This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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