U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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