just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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