THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Drunk is a universal language darling
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
