To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
