Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Randomize
