tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize