Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
