i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Randomize
