so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
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I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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