At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
