Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
