Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize