You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
