Your mouth is God's brothel.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
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Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
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When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
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