BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
