508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
