Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize