wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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