elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
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