Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
