her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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