oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
as a side note pls kill me
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
