but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
