I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
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it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
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HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
the raccoons are back...
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