How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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