Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I intend to get homeless drunk
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
