Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
