Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I think my vagina is haunted
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize