I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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