Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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