so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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