Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
You can't motorboat a personality
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
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cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
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I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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