is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
wow bdsm is so cute
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