and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
