So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize