and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
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This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
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How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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