Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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