Im at strip club and am horny
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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