its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes