now i know why i became what i already was.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
