This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
