I wish my penis had an off switch
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.