Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(865): View more from Tennessee

I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.

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(503): View more from Oregon

After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(510): View more from California

Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor

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(903): View more from Texas

I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on

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(913): View more from Kansas

You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.

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(360): View more from Washington

can I cover your dick in cookie butter?

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(404): View more from Georgia

I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises

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