News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
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