We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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